more me

So Now Im home more and now I have to find things to write about. :P

I am finding myself walking around half crazy. I need to write a list or a list for each day of "THINGS TO DO" I know in my mind I have this or that to do but I find myself loafing around or facebooking. I am not a real go getter or clean freak. ahhh if a sock in the corrner for 3 days ... so what. Before I was working and too tired. now im home more, so now I have to motivate myself.
I entered a picture with my daughter and the 2 pugs sleeping with her,in a pet contest in the newspaper. It may not win but it was worth the try.

Im alittle worried about cutting my hours back. Im afraid we will fall behind. we will be ok but it will be tight.

Yesterday was a full day of running around. Cowen had OT at 10:30am-11:30 counciling 12pm -1 girls get out at 2 on wed. then it was to the store to pick up a few things for supper. Jim came home ate and left. His band is recording a cd so they have been busy with that. Today it was just OT for Cowen and the rest of the day he just bugged me about his nintindo dsi, it was taken away because he was naughty... so with daddy at work he thought he could work me HA and he did!

Brrrrrr we need to move to Arizona!!!

Im sitting here trying to keep warm. I used to LOVE the cold weather but gosh this winter is really cold. I guess a sign of getting old. hint.. hint. My birthday is just around the corner and I'll be "GULP" 40. My friend is having a party on her 40th I just might crawl under a rock!

Tonight was Teanna's winter program. I have a long bitch about that but I will save you the time and forget it. any way I tried to take pictures and my camera went dead. never fails.

On an exciting note,this morning the local news had a short segment on our ghost hunting. They played the evp's we had... I shouldnt say we. the Other gal I was with caught it on her recorder. So that was the excitment of the day. I didnt get much done, So I guess I try again tomorrow.

Dec. post

So I guess im making it once a month post. December..... amonth I wish would come and go quickly!!!! Most of my shopping is done, I just need to get a few small things. The hubby wanted to get them EVERYTHING they wanted for Christmas and mommy said NO :)
I have cut my hous at work. It still hasnt sunk in yet. I feel like I have to get up and go to work. My house is still a wreck but im slowly working on it.
Jim's Christmas party was this last weekend so the kids went and stayed with GrandmaE. It was nice having a night alone. Although it was kinda like that episode of "everybody love's Raymond" where we didnt have much to say to each other. I dont think it was cuz we didnt have nothing to say.. for me it was taking in the silence and enjoying it.
The dogs are keeping ME busy .... IN..OUT..IN..OUT x'S 3(3 DOGS THAT IS)

Until next time.. hope eveyone keeps warm.

Hope seems to be lost... feels like

Im lost..... I need to find myself. I've been the one who see's the brighter side.... So many things, I hate my job, hate my kids school,OT twice a week,counciling for all 3 kids. Did I say I hate my job, I dont hate what I do.. just where I work. My house is a mess, and everything feels out of control. I need someone to talk to other than my family. Or maybe a place to just post my thoughts so I dont keep them all bottled up. So here we go.

My family in the dog house

I had a yucky day 1/2. I had to work this weekend and the hubby watched the kids. On sunday Jim called me at work to tell me Tinker bell was gone and the 4yr old let her go. I totally freaked out on him. I wanted to know why the 4 yr old had the dog out. Seems no one wanted to take her out to potty and told him to do it. He is small for his age his fine moter skill are bad, he doesnt grab or hang on to stuff very good. We called every one we could on a sunday and prayed she was ok.
This morning I get a phone call from the police dept. saying they found my dog. They gave me the number of the guy and he told me how he found her. I was in tears!!!! I thanked him a million times and told him he just saved my husbands life!!
Jim told me Teanna was sooo sad she just bawled. So today when I picked them up from school Teanna said I made some lost dog posters, It just made me wanna cry.





So the lost has been found and I have both my babies.

finally can post pictures

waiting to go swimming, Thank you Nintindos!!


This is in front of a ship in the water park. and the only one I took. I was afraid I would get my camera wet.


And one of the puppies!!!!

Home sweet Home!!!

We took the kids to Omaha for a weekend trip away and stayed in an indoor water resort. I missed my puppies very bad!
Was a nice weekend away from home. The kids got to play with their nintindos dsi's. they still managed to argue a few times.

Destiny has broken out with a rash so I will be calling the dr today to see if we can get in. Im hoping it's not something serious but it makes me worry. My puppies are glad to be home. my baby Billbo gave me a scoldin, if thats a word.
Well, Im off to tackel the mound of laundry that is sitting in front of the washer.

Bratz...Bratz and more Bratz

No not my kids although sometimes.......... Just kidding! After a major melt down this morning with Destiny and clothes, not wanting to go to school. I decided to clean out the girls room. I moved their bed, guess what I found? 10 Bratz dolls and all the feet and clothes even a 3cpo head not in a bag or a box.. all over the floor. Now if I could just find the nintindo ds I would be happy.

So I will be selling Bratz on e-bay along with Destiny's clothes that dont fit.

Adoption

Uugggggghhhh I am feeling crazy today!!! for the past couple of weeks ive been glued to the computer. A adoptive Mom/ freind is adopting from Ukraine. There was no update for a while. does she not know im going crazy here!!!
Jim and I started our adoption journey to Ukraine. We had everything ready, all the papers were ready to go. we just didnt have enough money and I just go off the fertility rollercoaster. So with that said im just alittle excited/jealous. I want to go. :(
It was meant to be because I have 3 wonderful childern. Speaking of my kids were sick with the flu. My job is not always understanding about staying home. being in nursing you would think they would. I tried to post pictures. My laptop wont let me. So I guess Ill have to get on the old crapper puter.

Friday Grrrrr

Some may be ready for the weekend but im dreading it! I have to work :( Destiny's 9th B-day is sunday. She really didnt want to do much. We took her out to eat to a place she wanted to go. The other two kids were wired. Jim ended up yelling at them telling them they were acting like a bunch of apes.

Ive been kinda miserable with allergies. This year seems earlier than usual. Maybe im just getting old.

Im doing baby steps so small posts for now. But I will post a picture of Cowen from this weekend at the races.
Well, I was but my laptop is acting screwy, after 4 atemps I will try for tomorrow.

since school has started I have a little time to sit and update.
2 kids in counciling one on the way. Cowen age 4 is in OT for fine motor skills, twice a week. Working full time and all that stuff I dont have mush to write that readable.
We are having problems with birth gradparents, more like Bgrandma. She is so pushy and controling. What she doesnt know is Im the ring leader in MY family! I call the shots! Destiny's birthday is this weekend and they want to see her. Hmmmm ... I dont think it's a good time.

I have been battleing the dog crap. I have one train but our female pug is untrainable. Pee's every where even if taken out. Grrrrr!

My 14 yr wedding Anv. is the 14 of Oct. and we are wanting to take a trip. I really want to get out of Dodge .. I mean town.

well thats all for now.

Monday

Today was a good day.... HOT but good. A friend and I took our kids to the kiddie pool just like old times. When we were sahms. What was really great was nobody was really there. It usually is packed. I should have taken pictures but the brain was on overload, We packed like we were going camping.

Fathers day was ... ok, I had to work. I bought him some stuff and took him out to eat. Thats about all.

Im not really liking summer so far. Rain and thunder storms, tornados and now HOT muggy heat. And when I go t work I have to wear unbreathable clothes.
Well, the dogg is telling me it's time for bed. I would hae more time if I wasnt soo addicted to facebook. I have reunited with some old friends from hight school, LOVE IT!!!! Plus Farm Town.

So I gotta go. I posted a picture of the puggies. I had to put them on the wash machine, it was the only way to get them to sit still.

kid free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My kids are gone for a week. They left sunday with my sister to the farm. She took all 3. So I'm supose to be going through stuff for our yard sale. cleaning my house, but i'm enjoying the peace and quiet for now. Yes I slept in and it was great except the dogs still need taken care of and they let me know it. I have a few days off and I really can't get into gear to do anything today.

Some of the blogs that are on my friends list that I read everyday, I wish I lived closer to some I think we would be good friends. I don't have a lot of friends that are in the same situation as me. We don't have friends that have adopted or did foster care. All our friends are supportive but don't really understand what we go through or understand what RAD kids are.

Well, thats about all the blubbering I should do for today, Bilbo and I need to get busy.(he's snoring right beside me)

I wrote this last night

Mothers day weekend we took the kids to South Dakota. We stayed in a motel with a huge indoor water park. It was supose to be relaxing for me. But it just seemed like we were in the car most of the time. It's a long drive for 4 complainers (3 kids and me:p )
The weather was hot here today and my girls got sun burnt for the first time and school isn't even out yet. Good old Nebraska weather, I'm sure it will rain tomorrow. I was going to post a few pictures from the trip but they are on my lap top and Jim is on it. I will try later. The thing about waking up @ 4am is I find it hard to type or think after kids are gone to bed. So I better spit out what I can before the MUSH takes over.
This morning Was a crazy day. We have not had a RAD morning in a while so I knew it was coming. She can only hold back for so long. My head is starting to hurt just bringing it up. What I found out was not to get all flustered up about it. But I did and it bothered me all day. The min. I droped her off at my Mom's it was over for her. and thats what pisses me off more. She knew it was all about getting to me. and then it was all over. I instead was grumpy at work all day.

Sorry I didn't finish this last night. It must have been when the mush hit.

Mommies babies

My new obsession. Yes I bought girlie clothes for her.

STILL HERE

I'm still here. My job has been sucky lately and I didn't want to be all bitchy here,soo i was bitchy to everyone else. I demanded for mothers day we go somewhere relaxing Sooo We are getting ready to go on Vacation and every one is getting sick.

We did have an addition to our family, New Puppy. I decided my life want crazy enough we got another pug. I will try and post a picture of her. she is all black, a little cutie.
I will write more later

I'M ON VACATION!!!!! WOOOOO HOOOOO (DOING THE VACATION DANCE)

It's not pretty!

I had a real busy week last week. If I posted last week I would have said it was a week from $#&$ But I will say it was a busy RAD week. At our house they are RAD weeks not just a RAD day. It might have started because BP just showed up at our door. Hubby was not happy.

The week started out about clothes. We set clothes out the night before, then it has to be something else, Headach,something in her eye,back pack(can't find), diareaha, Hair, You name it and it becomes this big crazy whinning crying morning. It seem the more I try to please her by having every thing ready so we don't have to go through this, the more trouble it is. THEN we have all the after school stuff. The min. she get's in the car she instantly has a headache. And it's pretty bad when her sister get's in the car before and see's her coming and say's "here we go, I have a headache!"
I took the 2 girls to walmart to get 216 pictures printed of my camera. (cowen was with Daddy) D started off by saying she had to go to the bathroom and of course T wanted to go. I told them one at a time. It ended up being a big mess in the bathroom and I was crazy mad!!! We had therapy right after that and I visited with her before D went in. I said The hubby need's to start to come. I was sooo through with her. She was going to give me a heart attack or put me in the crazy place.

I let her get me and she kept reeling me in. I usually do good at dis engaging But she got to me. I have to learn to deal with the behaviors then to focas on the reasons behind them. This weekend was great. We made strawberry short cake together and this morning was a good morning. We did have a talk, Destiny and I and we both apoligized to each other. I can actually say I Love that kid She is teaching me something every day.

another day of brain mush

I am addicted to a farm game on facebook. This is new for me because I disliked those kinds of places.
The past few days Ive been up late and then turn around and get up at 4 am get 3 kids up at 5 am and take them to day care and me to work. I get off at 2pm pick kids up at 3pm. then start thinking about supper, home work, letting dogs out.and somewhere in there you have some one touching me, some one hit me, some one's breathing on me. See what I mean BRAIN MUSH. I would like a WEEK to my self and maybe the hubby.
So when I get on to post the ol brain has nothing left.

A lady I work with, her pug just had babies. My Bilbo is the daddy. So I get a pup from the batch. Now I'm not so sure if I want another one. Pugs are great with kids. I just don't want more on my plate. The hubby does help but for some reason I end up doing everything.

I started cleaning. I did Cowen's room. I have 2 boxes to go to goodwill. The girls room is gonna be a chore, We did go through all their clothes and go rid of alot. I was going to sell some stuff on E-bay, to much trouble. It would be ok if I could stay home so I could watch everything but I would probable forget to.

Well, I need to take the ol brain and recharge.
Good night.

I want to thank Brie for my first ever award. I don't feel like I post enough that anyone really reads my blog.

My favorites are

0to3in90days

Living with RAD

Home... Hands Full, HEARTS Full, Quiver Full!

fostercarespacewarp

Sorry I don't know how to link yet. Brain is mush tonight.

1. Copy the above logo and put it on blog or post.
2. Nominate at least 10 blogs that show attitude and/or gratitude (Those who add sweetness to life and/or inspire you by making lemonade.)
3. Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.
4. Let them know they have received this award by commenting on a post.
5. Nominate your favorites and link to this blog.

I do have more favorites but I'm tired we had a busy 2 days. Teanna's B-day was yesterday and we had a skating party today.

Blah

This weekend is BLAH for me. I work come home and thats about it. It's nice out so kids are out playing. I wish I could take a nap.

I've been thinking about Vacation. We usually take a vacation in June and I need to put in for it or I will not get it. I really need to get out of this place. I need one for just Me and the hubby.

I have been buying summer clothes for the kids. I bought new swim suits for the girls. I love spring. The air always smells good. I should be taking a walk in this nice weather instead of on the computer. But I have a farm on face book and it is sooo addictive!!!!

Well, thats all I hope everyone has a good weekend!!

Nothin but mush

Thats what my brain feels like or thats what kids do to me. Kids have been out this week for spring break. I have had it with miss sassy pants. The older she gets the more I see she is gonna be the cause of all my gray hairs (not that I have any:P)
T my middle one is turning 7 in a week. she was a rough one until she turned 4 and she has really been a wonderful kid. C is 4 and he makes me think I'm not liken 4. I they will get older fast and I will miss all this. But all the bickering and fighting can drive on to drink.

One night We all watched a movie. At the end of the movie this picture is what I found and it was sooo cute I couldn't resist.



I will try to be around more.

100$ ticket for driving 25!!!!!!

Dishes are soaking, wash machine going, Pug is snoring. and it's nice out!

Kids get out of school at 2 then we have appt with therapist "we" meaning D although I could use some lately. I got a ticket today for speeding going .. ready for this?? 25. I understand in a school zone. But 25 is hardly speeding. Thy need to catch some of those A holes that go 40 through there when there is kids around. When I got caught kids were already in school. 25!!!! They were just looking for someone, Dumb heads!!!

Last night I was up at 2 am. This has been the 3rd night. I don't know whats going on. In the evening I get soo tired that I have been going to bed early, and early is 7:30-8pm I mean sooo tired that I can't keep my eyes open or move.
So I'm up at 2am and I get on facebook and all these people that I graduated with are writing me. I had to look up some of these people because I didn't remember them. It was weird cause I didn't talk to these people when I was in High school and they acted as if we were great friends. Thats ok it has been fun finding new friends to talk with.

My kids amaze me with some of the stuff they say or do and make me do. I have always been a quiet NON-CROWD kinda girl. But since having kids they made me open up much more. I was filling out one of those e-mails you fill out "whats your name" What kinda shoes are you wearing, Who will respond back and so on. Well, I got to one answer and it asked me what my talent was. I was stumped. My 6 yr old told me I had lots of talent, I cooked good. So thats what I put. :)

Pictures from my GH Night

OK here are a few... I didn't take many from the night me and my friend went ghost hunting.

The ceiling at the grand theater


Rach talking to ghost * Is there anybody in here?*


Looking inside what they call "THE VOID" in the basement of the grand

Looking out from the void


It was an intresting night. We learned some history on the grand and about our town. We had a few weird sounds and that was it. Not sure what to think about it.

My little stormtrooper




He uses the force on his sisters



He is spiderman every day. We have 2 outfits because he wears them all the time.



My Hero BATMAN




Everyday he's my little superhero

You can't see the red streaks I got in my hair but they are there.

Rad morning and I don't mean fun

I have little time, I have tons of stuff to do today and I'm only allowed 20min on the computer.

D my 8 yr old was upset this morning. She showed me a note from the Teacher. She should have showed me yesterday. The note said she didn't get to play out doors cause of runing around the room chasing some one. I told her I was upset because she got to go to the store and buy her own chips. Thats what she gets for a reward for behaving in school and at home. So I told her she was grounded from every thing (my mistake) She replied "EVEN FOOD???" I forgot for a moment, I don' know why....But this kind of conversation happens everyday and I must of had a brain fart. I told her in a calm voice That she would not be getting chip today and no tv. You would have thought I half killed her. Whinning and moodieness all the way to school. The other kids were just fine.

Sooo now on to what I am doing for myself. Our community collage is having a class on ghost hunting again. My friend Rachel and I are going. I am not sure I'm a true beleaver but I had fun the last time we went. We have an old theater that people say is haunted so thats where we are going tonight. I might post some picture if I get any good ones.
Well, time is up and I need to go and check facebook.

Beautiful day in the neighborhood!!

The snow is blowing and I took the kids to daycare. Ok they wanted to go because they were having a Valentines party. I don't blame them. They have been cooped up in here all winter. They were out of school for conf. anyway.
So I am working on books for the kids for Valentine THANKS BRENDA for the Idea. I'm gonna scapbook a little thing or atleast try.
Destiny has been good lately. She is ungrounded from Walmart, She did great and acted like an 8yr old instead of a 2yr old. I trll her everyday how much I love her amd her sister. I truely feel blessed!!!!

I ran to the store in this yucky stuff. We are supose to get alot of snow. So now my frig is full and I wont have to worry about that this weekend or at least Jim doesn't. I have to work and he'll be stuck with them. So I bought tons of healthy munchy foods and some not.

Bilbo is sitting here staring at me, wanting me to let him out. He likes the snow, weird-o.
I was going to post a picture of my project but my camera is acting up. So I'll post one of my favorite pictures of my monkeys.

Time goes by too fast. I get on read my mail, read every ones blogs and then something comes up and I don't have time to post.

For some of you that don't know me, I have been having a mid-life whatever. I turned 39 in Jan. I didn't post it, nothing exciting. So I have come up with extreme Faburary. I dyed my hair, waxed my eye brows (never did that before) and I want to get a tatoo with my kids names on it. Thats EXTREME for me.

Ramblings

I worked all weekend and It went so fast!! Thats the kinda weekend I like to have when I work.
Jim made up a bunch of yummy stuff to eat while we watched the superbowl. Watching football is one thing we do together, Although I watched for the commercials:)
We have been thinking about where we want to go for Vacation this year. Last year Jim and I went to Alaska for my nephew's wedding. We had a great time. Then we took the kids to Worlds of fun in Kansas city, then to a indoor water park in Omaha. The kids want to go back to South Dakota but Jim wants to go somewhere different.

I have been busy going through kids stuff, getting rid of junk,clothes, whatever is in my way. I guess I will try a garage sale this year. It's alot of work and some days I am LAZY and just don't want to deal with it. I would rather bag it and send it to goodwill. SO I will try it for my Moms sake. She want to try it to get rid of stuff and she needs the money.

Well thats all I got today. My day off and I've done nothing!!

I am sick again and I had no internet this morning, Talk about going crazy. I decided to sleep with My prince next to me on the couch.

Wednesdays Is D's day for therapy. Sometimes I like going and somedays I feel bad for her. She gives me good ideas how to deal with D's behaviors but I also think D needs to learn to talk about her feelings. She has issues/questions stuck deep down inside. She either is afraid to talk to me or she wants it all to her self. She truely is a wonderful kid. The break she had when she went to grandmas this last weekend was good. We were watching Hells kitchen and she said she wanted to go on that show, Jim giggled and said you hvae to know how to cook. She said she would make ramon noodles.

I got my hair cut yesterday. I made an appoint ment to color my hair next week. Thats if I don't chicken out. I have hi-lighted my hair but never went darker. We'll see.


My prince Bilbo

Bathroom activity

Do you know what this is??

While I was doing laundry I heard a little voice in the bathroom sining. I found my 4yr old sitting on the toilet. He asked me if I knew what this was. The adult part of my brain says he was making a mess but I went with it and asked "what?" He happily replied "a pattern" He is such a bright little kid. I left it there so Daddy could see it.

A wonerful but cold Saturday

I am enjoying my weekend. D is gone for the weekend, staying with grandma Elaine. for some reason I felt all the stress releaved. She did call and want to be picked up cuz she wasn't getting her way there and I said no and she hung up on me. Oh well. I took T and C to walmart last night to get a few things, I can't remember a trip to walmart that was that great WITH KIDS.
I bought T some new books and she fell asleep on the couch reading. I fell asleep on the couch too and woke up at 4am with a stiff neck, Thanks Hubby!!
Today is game day. The hubby gets out the wii or the other thing and plays Guiter hero with the kids. I like the sports ones better.

WARNING!!! Crabbieness

MONDAY My favorite day, Usually just like every RAD day around here.
Every Sunday is wash day for the week. And kids sit their clothes out for school the night before. I usually work at 6am so that means kids get up at 5am so I can drive 2 diff. places to drop kids off. This morning I didn't have to work. Started off last night when I told kids it was time to shower and get PJs on. My 6yr old usually does what I ask her. 8 yrold decided she would do what ever and when ever she felt like it. So we had melt down before bed about shower (her way of avoiding going to bed) This morning started out the same whinning and crying even after taking a shower. She sat out her clothes.. The ones she wanted to wear and didn't like them. Sat and bawled and refused to get dressed. The other kids and I were ready to go out the door and she is yelling at me cuz I wouldn't let her change her clothes. she hates shool,hates her pants to tight,she will pee her pants, I'm a bad mom because she will pee her pants at school and thats my fault, she hates her life. 8 I'm telling you she is 8 what do I have a head of me??? Drama every morning.

Lost

This is one of the first pictures we took of the girls when they came to live with us. They looked soo lost. We had a pool and they wouldn't get in it. They didn't like the bath tub either. D used to worry that her and her sister would get lost.
T was big for 2. her and D shared clothes well, they still do. everybody would ask if they were twins. They might as well be because they act like it. It is amazing the love/hate they have for each other. I never got to experience that. I have 3 brothers and one sister but they were all way older then me. I was like an only child. I did grow up next door to a family with kids. Jennifer was my best friend growing up. Our parents still live next to each other. My Mom said we fought like sisters. Hmmmm I might have to find some old pictures to post.

We went and seen the monster trucks



They had fun but I'm sure the people in front of us wished they sat somewhere else

My deposit for the day

Working full time and 3 busy kids 2 of them RAD is exhausting !!!
After work I decided to pull up at the school early. I turned on my public radio station and listened to classical music, Put me right to sleep! I woke up just in time for the bell to ring and all the parents standing around my car. I was hoping I was not sleeping with my mouth open.
We ate out for supper. My reward for cooking all week.
Every time we go out to eat we don't think about how crazy it is until we get seated and kids start squirming. WHY DO WE DO THIS TO OUR SELFS??? We lived.

I have a list of goals for the new year. I just have to write them down before I can post them. The main (and hardest) one is getting my weight under control. I like to procrastinate.

I have been kinda weird lately- pre menopausal ... maybe. The other day I droped the girls off at school. The school is next to a park with a lake and tons of ducks. I and Cowen drove through, and I pointed out the ducks they looked like the were eating. Cowen informed me he was going to be a duck and eat bugs and fly reaaaaallll high in the sky. then he said "You know I'm spiderman" and I said "I know" He just made me start crying.

My girls

Blahness

I am going to make another "about me" post.

My husband and I have been together since JR. High. married when we were 25. Tried for 3 years to get pregnant, decided to try International adoption. I had went from one roller coaster to another and was burnt out. Some family members thought we should do foster care and I would get prego which drove me even crazier. Our first placements were our girls at ages 2 and 3 1/2. They melted our hearts. After all the crazy days when I thought I would never be a Mom and here they were. People say you guys did a wonderful thing taking them in and giving them a home. I thought I was the only one that thought that sounded crazy, because I seen it as they saved me. They were the answer to my prayers. Then we got a call for a little boy 15 months. So now we are a family.

My real name is Jeanelle but my knick name is Nelly. I have had that name since I was little. I am the youngest of 5 and a "late child" Not unplanned but late. I'm the one in the blue.